March 2025

Tory Whanau may have to sell Wellington mayoralty to make ends meet September 20, 2024
Tory Whanau has revealed that she’s struggling so much financially that she may have to part with her beloved mayoralty, that of New Zealand’s capital city, if she’s to fund her ever-diminishing lifestyle. Whanau was elected to lead Wellington in 2022, winning an overwhelming victory against the incumbent mayor: the evil version of Jason Gunn. […]
Ben Uffindell
Ukrainian militia receives defective shipment of pagers that just send and receive messages September 18, 2024
There’s been a major setback for one Ukrainian-backed militia on the Russian border, after the group ordered a large shipment of pagers to use as improvised explosive devices. The plan was to litter the pagers throughout abandoned homes and buildings in hopes of wounding Russian soldiers. But upon arrival of the shipment, routed through the […]
Ben Uffindell
Government directs Te Puni Kōkiri to conduct Māori Language Week in English September 17, 2024
The coalition government has issued a directive to Te Puni Kōkiri, the Ministry of Māori Development, instructing them that – in the interests of clear communication – they are to conduct this year’s Māori Language Week primarily or exclusively in English. The directive is in line with the Government’s policy – signaled when they came […]
Ben Uffindell
Government celebrates fact that New Zealand’s healthcare is so good people are queuing up for it at 5am September 17, 2024
At yesterday’s post-cabinet press conference, Prime Minister Christopher Luxon, flanked by his Health Minister Shane Reti and someone we can’t independently verify was a real sign language interpreter, announced that he had some positive news for the country. “Alright team, I’m just going to hand over to uh, Dr. Shane, because I think he’s got […]
Ben Uffindell
Heartwarming: Thoughtful driver uses indicator to tell you what they’ve just done September 17, 2024
It’s 4:10pm in the morning, and you’re in the middle lane heading north on the great southern motorway of our nation’s capital, Auckland. There are no cars directly in front of you, but quite a few in the lane to your left. Suddenly, without warning, a black ute enters your lane, cutting in front of […]
Ben Uffindell
NPC teams will now be allowed to actually use the Ranfurly Shield in play September 17, 2024
Following decades of controversy, the governing body of New Zealand rugby, New Zealand Rugby, has ruled that the team currently holding the Ranfurly Shield may once again use it in play during the National Provincial Championship (NPC). The ruling restores the utility of a prize that for many years was rendered merely symbolic, after the […]
Ben Uffindell
Police say they won’t respond to bomb threats anymore as ‘it’s never anything’ September 16, 2024
Police Commissioner Andrew Coster says that New Zealand’s police force will no longer respond to bomb threats, in an attempt to cut costs and redirect police resources to less boring activities. Coster said that threat response and bomb disposal was a “fairly obvious” area for downsizing, as bomb threats are “never anything”, a “huge waste […]
Ben Uffindell
Air New Zealand flight attendant named CEO after one year on job November 30, 2021
New Zealand’s national carrier, Air New Zealand, has expressed great enthusiasm in announcing its new CEO today: 51-year-old Nathan Guy, a flight attendant who has spent about 1200 hours on the job. Guy joined the company as a fresh-faced, wide-eyed flight attendant serving now-reduced domestic routes in November of 2020, and has since spent a […]
Ben Uffindell
National Party board denies it unanimously agreed to Collins’ Faustian bargain with Satan November 26, 2021
National Party president Peter Goodfellow is today issuing a strong denial on behalf of the party’s board, saying they did not, at any point, agree to the Faustian bargain that National leader Judith Collins struck with the Evil One, Son of Perdition, the Devil Satan himself. When Collins became the leader of the National Party […]
Ben Uffindell
Super Saturday recap: Patrick Gower doesn’t know what he’s supposed to do October 16, 2021
It was Aotearoa’s first national day of action in over ten years, the first since 2010, when Prime Minister John Key tried to inspire us to clean up our nation’s berms. It didn’t work. Today, New Zealand’s berms are worse than ever. But history is not destiny, and other cliches. Today, we tried again, this […]
Ben Uffindell

'Rewriting of history': Robertson stands by Covid spending August 19, 2025
Grant Robertson. File photo: Getty Images By Russell Palmer of RNZ
Collins admits she 'mixed up' $147K teacher pay claim August 19, 2025
Public Service Minister Judith Collins and Education Minister Erica Stanford. Photo: RNZ Public Service Minister Judith Collins rejects that her comments regarding teachers' pay has harmed their relationship with the government.
'No significant concerns' over animal welfare at Lincoln University farm August 19, 2025
Photos: SAFE The Ministry for Primary Industries has visited Lincoln University's demonstration dairy farm following a complaint about animal welfare there.
Accused sportsman 'not type of person' to hurt baby August 19, 2025
Photo: ODT files A prominent sportsman accused of crushing a baby, causing more than a dozen broken ribs, is “not that type of person”, the child’s mother says.
Rob Kidd
'No significant concerns' over animal welfare at uni farm August 19, 2025
Photos: SAFE The Ministry for Primary Industries has visited Lincoln University's demonstration dairy farm following a complaint about animal welfare there.
Two All Blacks ruled out of Argentina test August 19, 2025
Chch murder conviction referred to Court of Appeal after 27 years August 19, 2025
By Sam Sherwood of RNZ
Watchdog refers 1997 Chch murder to Court of Appeal August 19, 2025
By Sam Sherwood of RNZ
Silver Ferns captain Ameliaranne Ekenasio to leave Magic August 19, 2025
Stuff staff vote to strike over collective deal August 19, 2025

Search New Zealand News

March 2025

Blue-chip stocks back in favour as sharemarket rises – Market close

Allen, Seifert and bowlers combine to hand NZ 2-0 lead after rain-shortened contest

Devine, Kerr, Tahuhu return to New Zealand squad for Australia T20Is

US Federal Reserve decision and positive local GDP figures buoy investors – Market close

Allen, Seifert and bowlers combine to hand NZ 2-0 lead in rain-shortened contest

You Missed

Covid and tax fraudster used false identities to try to steal $220,000

Comvita receives takeover offer from Mark Stewart’s Florenz worth $56.4 million

This isn’t a housing market meltdown, it’s a full-blown crash – Liam Dann

Zuru nappy trial: Rascals patriach challenged over claims

Search New Zealand News